Unfairness

My heart breaks at the thoughts of issues relating to the "african man". For him freedom is just a word that is never a reality. To an extend this is true no man is free, you are either a slave to what you like or don't like. But man can obtain freedom to a certain degree. Why do I have to perform or fit to a certain standard that keeps me a slave and does not allow me to exercise my abilities and giftings all because another man is scared that if I am given that "luxury" I would go beyond his control. The African man has never known creativity because he is lured and unknowingly he gives away his power which makes him dependent on who ever he gives his power to. On an individual level, the African man struggles to keep himself to himself because long ago he had lost himself by giving up dreams because of circumstances. Many African men and women die at the age of 9 or 10 because this is when they give up dreaming for a change and great things and settle for the familiar, and bondage. Hopelessness, is the cause of so many mental, spiritual and physical deaths. HIV/AIDS only comes after this. The few African men that have achieved their dreams or got close to it had to go on a journey that took them through 14 seas and mountains twice the numbers of the seas for their dreams to be visible. This might sound familiar to every man and woman on earth but believe me or not the African man feels a level lower than most people in reaching his dream. On a community level, the African man has to perform because his individual power does not count. He confirms to the people because that is the only way he/she can count. In an international level, he is seen as an opportunist. When he travels around, his first sight is not the beauty of the lands his fathers never saw but the sights of people running away from him like he had a sign that says, "I'm Mr. despair/opportunist, run away.". People have a box where the African man must fit. The dos and don'ts that governs the African man compared to the rest of the world always are different. All because he is African. He always has a place to give the world another chance in his heart. So, where ever he sees something new a little hope sparks and curiosity leads him to this place. No wonder churches are filled and so are places of worship of other religions, this is all in the process of finding worth and freedom. Oh African man, what could be the answer to this problem? What kind of gospel can we preach to this man? where can we find this freedom? We would buy it even if it would cost us the whole wealth that we've got. It is better to be free and poor but still have dignity than to be a rich slave without freedom.

I take in so many things through my eyes, how could it be? how could it be that I could be hurt inside of me by just seeing things!!! I as a man is often moved emotionally by what I see be it nature, creation, women, pain and reality. I sometimes wish I did not see a lot of the injustice and lack of love; lack of genuine love in my world. I sometimes wish I couldn't see all the oppression. Does that mean I need to plug off my eye? NO!!! I pray today to my father to make me see even more for my heart to break until I have no heart to take the pain and injustice but a heart to make....a change! Lord LET ME SEE my world of pain today.

I am writing this just at the end of my time with God, a bit emotional and keeps me in deep thinking. What would be my ultimate Christmas gift without being spiritual about anything? The cross. This is the very essence of my existence. I have searched for true meaning in giving out a gift to either my family or friends close to my heart or a girl I am in love with and I have really thought through this, if I do give them something that would not remind them of the gift that has given me my life back then I shouldn't give it at all.
So...my cross is not only a wooden thing with 4 ends but something that hurts me deep and it is so painful that it makes me want to NOT give it away. Why would a king...not only the king of heaven but everything my eyes has ever seen and would never see come as a baby to give himself away not in the sense of adoption but in a death and suffering...why? why can't I see this everyday and choose to follow this humble baby who as a baby never had a chance of a nice birth place all because of me? I want to unwrap this present and meet his presence...the Cross that leads me to his heart.

Sit back and begin to look at the horrors of this world, never has it like this come close to the church since the wars of the days pass and the persecution of the Church. I wonder why this is coming close to us. Lets say the church has failed God? is it possible to say that there is no part of the body that has remained faithful to God? I don't know you answer for yourself as I have for myself. Is it a way of God sending out his wrath upon us? Some might say "yes" to this, but I still remain unsure about this. If you asked me, my response, I'll say it is God's way of telling us we have to begin to do something. God is the God of everything and if we are his Children and He our Father it means our inheritance is everything...heaven and so on earth. Sounds a little bit dark to say "my inheritance is here on earth". What about the nations God has called us to shine the light in to, ain't they inheritance? The love of God is far more than written theology, it is a grabbing experience that holds you and brings you close to reality as our Father sees it. So, all these killing that has crippled into the Church could be a sign of God saying move closer and see from a close place what people in the "outside" world experience and be a hope to them. I love God and hate the troubles of life but wouldn't the Love of God that reflects as hope from me to a hopeless world be needed more than in a setting where people enjoy this love and have it in abundance? my love for him shouldn't be selfish, my love for him isn't only a spiritual thing or a spiritual answer, it is not seen only in how many verses I can quote but the numbers of "hopeless" situation I have gone through and seen the hope that God has given to me as his son through Christ Jesus. My love for him could be seen practically, it is Real! Bless you who live like Christ putting words into action in this world with so much despair and bringing hope to the hopeless.

Update

It has been great experiencing God in and around the people I interact with daily. I just sent my update via email but if you view this blog and didn't get this update please let me know, contact me on Gabstevens2004@hotmail.com. Thanks for viewing this blog and also praying for me.
Gabriel

Reflection...

For Christ, his purpose was one...the Cross. All other things (miracles and His divine teaching)were just part of the process and were going to lead him to the place at that right time... THE CROSS...and that is where I find redemption and restoration and I guess we all do. My one purpose is to serve God, all other things... (ministry) is just part of the process that leads me to that place... to serve God.

It is good to be back on the base and just relax and get ready for the next step in the plan. God has been talking to me about the value of man. It is hard to explain on this page the whole thing but the heart behind I can try to share. God has reminded me over and over again that if he hadn't value every individual in the world, He wouldn't have died. The value that I have on things make me love them. The same with God, if he loves us he will value us and the other way round. The depth of my spirituality in him can be seen in the way I value and love people around me. Love is the answer, he said it in little words but it meant big, Love God... and other as yourself. Matt 22:37-38. I urge you my friends to do this, this alone can bring healing to all nations. Gabriel Stevens